Thursday, July 16, 2009

Sister's and Sister's.

Very early yesterday morning, I hugged and kissed two of my girly's good-bye for five whole days. They are off to New York with their daddy to do some sight-seeing and for Taylor to run in her very first 5k! Kris's uncle died a few years ago and he was a fire-fighter up in NY and they hold this race in honor of him every year.

I'm having a bit of mommy guilt this morning for not being there but I think this time with their daddy is a good thing. And some time away for them from the ever-needful-tantrum throwing boo is not such a bad thing either. :)

The Boo is also on her way outta here this afternoon. She's taking a little trip to my mom's house in Ashabill (as she would say) where I'm sure she will convince my mom and dad of all sorts of things to do. Like her some new shoes?? I don't know...maybe. But, I would NEVER coach my child on how to sweet talk her way into such needed items. Never. {wink}

And so...where will this leave me for a few days? Here, in the little brick house. With the the little-big-moving mess and the little-book-proposal/stress fueler.

I'm looking foreword to it, I think. But I know this time is a God-send as my head has been spinning like a mad woman for the past few weeks and this would provide an excellent opportunity to take said head off and let it re-group! :)

But I need to talk to you about something on this here blog today. And the topic....sisters.

Now, I wish sometimes more than anything that I had a sister. I mean, I really do. Because many of my friends who have sister's have incredible relationships where they keep each other's kids, house-sit so they can go on vacation, talk them through life's struggles and are just a shoulder to lean on.

I have a brother, who is great, but since the brother is well, a guy...this leads him to have guy-tendencies. You know, like not caring about such things as bead-board-wallpaper and what color to paint the new living room and how this fabric doesn't go with this and the sorts. :) But he's a great guy...just not a girl.

But here lately, I have been sooo confused with this sister thang.

I minute they love each other, literally the next...they hate!

Although my brother and I had our stuff, it was more consistent. Like we would go weeks with hating each other and him doing horrible tourcherous things to me like....making me drink salt and pepper water...oh yes, he did. Or kiss the wall...ah yes, this brings back sweet memories.

But these girls, oh my goodness.

I don't know if it's the combination of all three of them, their ages or WHAT but sometimes, I feel like I'm about to lose my mind with them.

In the new house it still only has three bedrooms so two girls have to share. And since Taylor has done nothing but rant and rave about how much she needs her "space", we decided that we would put Hope and the Kennyboo together.

Well, this was a fabulous idea until Taylor started thinking about what her life would be like without her sisters by her side 24/7. She then had the great summer melt-down a few weeks ago and came to me greatly flustered saying, "Hope is disowning me as a sister! And here is the contract!" (she literally had a contract, said something to the sorts of, HOPE is not Taylor's sister anymore! Sign here!....deep legal mumble jumble)

And then, there were many tears. MANY.

So to make things fair, because I am the judge remember, I decided to give Hope the option of what she would like to do.

This......was a bad idea.

For the next three days, Hope knew that she held the trumph card. If Taylor made her mad, she kicked her out of the new said room. If Taylor met all of her sisterly emotionally needs she would then regain the trust of sharing a room together.

And it would change from one minute until the next.

It seemed as though HopeAnn was loving this power-thing and this would be the key to her success of overcoming all middle child issues. You know like, not being heard or seen and just invincible in this little family of ours.

Well, the other day, I had to surrender her power and make the executive decision to let Taylor share a room with her. And taking away such power left that poor girly feeling quite frustrated! But what was I supposed to do? Sweet mercy.

Here is where I need you. If you have a sister, what was the biggest struggle that you had growing up? And how did your mom handle it? What special things did the two of you share?

Also...what is your relationship like with your sister today? Is there anything you wish you could change about your relationship?

Or if you are a mom of girls, how did/do you handle such situations? Any and every bit of input on this is great!

I'm very curious as to all of this! I need your help to understand these girls more.

Thanks y'all!! :)


auburnchick said...

I am blessed to have a sister who is three years younger than me. We fought like cats and dogs while growing up, but we are close now.

The thing that probably made me the maddest was how my mom treated us. It was clear early on that my sister was my mom's favorite. I kid you not.

Kids know when they are treated differently. I know it's nearly impossible to make things 100% equal, but you can sure try hard. Kids are all about fairness and no, sometimes out of hurt feelings or jealousy, they see things with a tainted perspective; however, when it comes to bigger things, every effort should be made to avoid bias.

I think the best thing you can do when they encounter problems is sit with them, encourage them to pray, and ask them what they think Jesus would do in that particular situation (would He share the bedroom?). Keep their eyes focused on Christ.

Fortunately, my sister and I overcame the natural obstacles of sister rivalry. There's nothing I would change about our relationship.

Ginger said...

Love this! My sister and I are four years apart and we shared a room up until high school. The whole family also shared one own daughter finds that really hard to believe! We also had our ups and downs and fought like cats and dogs.

Now we are very close, even though we live 3 hours apart. We get together as much as possible and talk often. She's my best friend!

Bethany said...

Hey Nicki! I have 3 sisters. One older and 2 younger. Growing up my older sister and I would fight all the time too! We probably had the most issues over sharing clothes. We shared a bedroom for most of our years at home together. As we got older we both kinda of went down two different paths. She got married pretty young and I went off to college. Now, I absolutely LOVE all of my sisters so much. They truley are my best friends! I am so glad I have them! We still even share closets sometimes:)!

Wendy said...

Nicki, I always wished I had a sister. What a lovely post this was. Just wanted to let you know I'll be at She Speaks this year, perhaps we can meet in person!