Monday, January 12, 2009

It's tough being a woman...

I recently started attending the new Esther study by Beth Moore. It's been great but a little hard to get back into the "depth" of Beth Moore studies!

The theme throughout Esther is "It's tough being a woman".

Amen.

I could end this blog right here! Oh but luck you, I'm going on. Ha ha. =)

I always love Mondays because I feel like they are a fresh start to a new week! Even though I know "technically" Sunday is the first day, it still feels like Monday is the start.

This week I need a fresh start!

A few days ago in the midst of chaos, I got into my car and took a deep breath. I said to the Lord, "God, there is just no way that I can homeschool these girls, sorry, you're just going to have to work something else out."

I started to cry because I was very overwhelmed with my girls at that moment and the thought of me being fully responsible for every second of their days just seemed overwhelming to me!

Then.....God. Yes, Then God. God put a song on the radio and I've put at the end of this blog. It's called "One Life to love". The words struck my heart like nothing ever before! We only get one time around in this life! ONE.

One shot. The one time around. One ride. One try.

Someone asked me why I was considering homeschool and I said it was all financial reasons but now I feel like God may be molding that decision into something else. I have made a lot of mistakes as a mom. And I want my girls to know they have a solid foundation in Christ in their family.

Take a moment to listen to this song.

Our teacher asked us to fill in the blanks to "It's tough being a woman...." and this song says it all for me:

"It's tough being a woman because God made our hearts to truly know that you only get one life to love."

What is God showing you today that you only get one time around to get this right? I know what He showed me.

I have gotten quite a few e-mails from friends who also feel like the Lord is leading them in the direction of homeschool for next year. Everyone is hurting financially right now and it's a huge struggle for many, many people. Please know that I am praying for you and as I come across helpful information I will pass it along on this blog as well. I don't want this to turn into my homeschool blog, but I want to encourage other's who are facing this decision as well!!

One life to Love by 33 miles:

8 comments:

JenB said...

You just said it beautifully! The Lord is really doing something big in you!

The Patterson 5 said...

Thanks for being so honest about your reactions to what God is saying to your heart- My prayers are with you as you are on an amazing adventure!

Gina said...

I was looking for someone doing the Esther bible study. I will be starting on Wednesday and will check in with you from time to time to see how its going. I work full time and sometimes neglect the word of God so I'm really excited (and nervious) about this bible study. I'm hoping it will help me develop some better habits!! Have you ever looked into k12 for your homeschool needs? they have "charter schools" that provide FREE books and computers. We did it for a semester but my middle schooler decided to go back because she missed her school friends. Blessings, Gina

Joyful said...

It was the message of this song that had me turn down 4 job offers between August and November. My son will be leaving for University in another year and my time with him at home is fleeting. I don't want to miss a single minute. We'll never look back and say we spent too much time with our children. No matter how much we pour into them, when they are gone we will wish we had done more.

Desiring no regrets,
Joy

Ginger said...

What a great song and such a true message. My daughter will soon be 17 and it just seems like yesterday that she was in elementary school. Embrace every moment. It really is tough being a woman. You feel so often that you carry the weight of the world on your shoulders. Listen to God..He is working in you!

Marilyn in Mississippi said...

Hi Nicki,

I'm not in your age bracket by a LONG shot but I do know how to empathize with you some. I homeschooled our 3 kids....2 boys and a girl...beginning in 1982 when our first child reached kindergarten age. Yes...you read that right! 1982! 27 long years ago! Maybe before you were even born! ha We were some of the first homeschoolers in our state. I felt so very isolated! It was 4 or 5 years into homeschooling before we even heard of a support group in a neighboring town! All our kids started homeschooling in kindergarten and finished homeschooling when they graduated 12th grade. Each one of them made high enough on the ACT college entrance exams to earn a full scholarship to our local 2-year community college.

Did I ever want to give up? You better believe it! EVERY year about this time when the weather was cold and messy and we were inside all the time. But by the time we finished the school year and had a summer break I was always ready to order new books and get to it again in the fall.

Did our kids every complain? You better believe it! Not really about being homeschooled but just about having to do school work in general. They would have other kids say to them...."I wish I was homeschooled so I could stay home and watch TV all day". Good grief! Is that what some people think we homeschoolers do? Anyway, my kids would say..."If you had a Mama like ours you would have to start school at 8:00 a.m. like we do!"

If you were to ask them today at the ages of 28, 30, and 31 if they are glad they were homeschooled, they would tell you yes. I know because they have written papers in college saying so. I have had them come to me and brag about how some teacher in college or some officer in the armed services complimented them on how well educated they were.

So, if the Lord leads you to homeschool....you CAN do it girlfriend! I didn't think I could. And I couldn't in my own power. But God was gracious and led me all the way. And also my husband was very, very supportive although he worked crazy hours and didn't do any of the actual teaching.

SO sorry this was so long but I just felt I wanted to encourage you a bit tonight.

Also...I'm supposed to be starting the Esther Bible study with a group of ladies the first week in February.

God bless you!

Marilyn

the alleys said...

thanks for your tips! :) i have a favor...or more of an opportunity to mention to you...we should talk soon. hope you are having a fun tuesday!

nanatrish said...

Nicki, I will be praying with you about this huge decision. If you feel the Lord leading you to do this then perhaps that is exactly what He is doing. I love 33 miles. We saw them in a concert last summer and they are great. Very loving guys and seem so sincere. I got the Esther study for Christmas from my daughter and I am loving it. I listen to the CDs back and forth to South Carolina and I am doing the homework at my pace. I am about half way done with the homework since I have had to do year end work. Let the Lord lead you. I would think at the end of the day to know you have done what He wants you to do will be worth it all. I'll be praying for you. Love, Trish