Monday, May 05, 2008

Like A Gentle Breeze

I've been "hot" the past few days. Frustrated, Weary, Tired, Angry.....you name it, I've had that emotion. I don't know why, maybe it was just a hormonal "rush", maybe I've been pushed to my limits, maybe I've just been burned out, maybe I've been under some major warfare........but maybe I've allowed myself to slip into this place?

Last night, my sweet, sweet Taylor had her choir performance at church. And let me just tell you, nothing like my God to give me a serving of humble pie through my girls. Watching my girly up there, singing her heart out with a SMILE on her face, praising Him for her name, taking the shackles off her feet, and calling her God by the many names........knowing that her momma MUST be related to "grumpy" of the seven dwarfs.........it really did me in! Has she been stressed out too? Yes.....we all have. My girls are about to have Girly War Seven in our home. Their gear is on and they are ready for any and every sneaky attack! At any moment the war could begin and the weapons are many! Taylor wants her own room and her own space so bad. Hope doesn't want to be alone for one second in fear of she might miss something!! And Kennedy thinks EVERYTHING and EVERYONE in this house is her to meet her ever need, at exactly the moment she demands it......or else! And they are all willing to fight for what they want!!!

But this morning, God has flown a gentle breeze through this home, and yes my windows are open and I'm listening to the birds sing his praise, but the gentle wind that flows through......has reminded me that God is here. He is flowing through this house, despite my attitude and my "momma blues". He has said, "Nicki, where is you focus?" And no, my focus has not been on scripture and filling myself with Him. It's been "Lord!!!! Get me through this fight! Lord, Get me through this tantrum! Lord, get me through one more sassy tone! Lord help me paint this wall....fast!!!"

Last night, after we got home, Taylor was SO fed up with Hope that she came to me in tears and said, "Momma, I just want to sleep on the couch, I can't stand to be near her for one more second." And of course this brought my Hopie to tears. So, I let Taylor sleep on the couch and tried to console my Hopie. She is so afraid of so many things, including being alone, that whenever Taylor isn't here for a sleepover or something, she freaks out.

At Gems last week, we had incredible speaker who came and helped us make a blessing box for our kids. Ways to teach our kids about Christ in ways that get down to their level. Because Taylor has always been so mature, I've often struggled with Hope's rationalization on things. I always think, "Well Taylor didn't feel like that when she was five". So, because I've never had to "come down a level" with Taylor, it's often hard for me to explain things to Hope. But one of the items we put into this box was an army man. I've set my box on the bookcase and haven't let my girls go through it, because if I did everything would be gone by now!! I knew when it was time, I would bring one item out at a time.

So as I was trying to talk to Hope, the Lord placed on my heart to go get that army man out. And I did. I brought it to Hope and we talked about her fears and why she is so afraid to be alone. We named the figure "Army Man" (I know, so unique!) and I placed him on her pretty pink princess bible. Through her tears she was able to understand that all of this fighting between her and Taylor is like a war, and it makes God very sad, and mommy very "head spinning" like. But that she didn't need to be afraid because God has Angels just like this Army Man all around her. And he was going to stand upon God's word and protect her. We also turned her Lava Lamp on and talked about how God is the light in the darkness and to look at that light and be reminded that He is with her. And just like that she fell fast asleep and didn't wake up once last night!

And as I awoke this morning, and realized how much the Lord had spoke to me through two of my girly's........it was very humbling. Praising Him despite our circumstances and our frustrations. Trusting in Him to cast off every fear and frustration. Yes.......out of the lives of babes, we will see Him.

I'm so glad it's a new week! I'm so glad that my girl's are home today! I'm so glad I get to spend some time with my friend today! I'm so glad that God makes all things new! I'm so glad that I can lay all of my cares, concerns, fears, failures down at His feet and trust in Him alone.

So because I love to hear back from all of you sweet readers, I would love to know of a time when the Lord used your children to humble you before Him, to remind you of something about Him. I can't wait to hear!!! It will surely bring many smiles to many faces to share if you'd like too in the comments!! Have a blessed, blessed day!!

2 comments:

Technonana said...

Sweetie... there was thing I prayed for more than anything when my children were little and that was TO BE PATIENT.Mothers are forever teachers. And I learned that is what God is with me... one day I will be just what He desires me to be,I am learning and growing each day, God is not finished with me yet!!

Stephanie said...

Hey girl, I know what you are saying, one day I was so blah and just, well, blah when my sweet Lydia Grace came up to me and said " hey momma do you remember when we saw that beautiful rainbow? And our God our it there, he promised." Girl I just melted. And I jut wanted to stop in and say hey and I've tagged you, so have fun.