Monday, September 17, 2007

So much on my mind!!

Ok, Lord, my mind is running in a thousand directions this've got to speak clearly through your people today. Yesterday Dr.Brown gave an incredible sermon on godliness......this is all apart of his LEGACY series, if I was really handy dandy, I'd know how to write that word and make it go directly to the link....please share if you know how to do that!!......ok anyways, his basic message was on women who had gone through an affair...but there was so much hidden in that message, how we should conduct ourselves being the general idea, not being like the "rest of the world".

He said something that really struck me hard.......He said, "If you feel God has called you to be a leader in this church, you'd better really make sure, because there are standards." Lately I have truly seen what true godliness is...I'm not there, I've just seen it, very clearly. The "things" of this world lately have just become so un-important.....yes I would still love to have a great big white house with columns in the front.....but I've seen lately just how much all of "this" is going to fade away. It hasn't changed my passions about decorating and re-doing this house, but it has made me stop and think each time I start to get OCD about it!!

So to not be like the rest of this that's quite a challenge in more ways than you or I could even wrap our minds around. Being a mom has become my favorite thing and biggest challenge.....but as I look at my three sets of blue eyes, my heart sinks....because what is to become of me after they are grown?? What is going to be left of Kris and I when they are gone? Oh yes, I have dreams of being a speaker, a writer and having unlimited amounts of time in pursuing it all...but I guess like how I've seen material "things" fading away, I also see "little people" growing up.

I often wonder, and maybe you have too......does God call each of us to stay at home, home school our children (and have a dozen of them) and devote our lives to becoming the perfect Proverbs 31 woman? Are these blogs that I've often mentioned who truly do devote themselves to this, in the MOST EXTREME WAY (and knock you down while you're at it!)......are they all that crazy?? Or are they truly pursuing godliness in their lives??? I will be honest, I've considered the home school route, and I admire ANYONE who God leads to do this.....but I just don't know if I could handle it day in and day out.....I think I'd do ok for like 2 weeks, and then be like OK THAT'S IT!! But lately, with my Taylor's little "attitude" problem...I've wondered, ok she's not watching TV, so it's not coming from maybe, I don't know.......but then I thought, could it possibly be from school??? The other kids whose parents send them to a Christian school as a check off on their list?? Obviously while Taylor is at school.....I have NO control over who she chooses to be friends with, and I don't really think she makes bad choices when it comes that route....but yet, she still is exposed to it. But yet I also know that she is surrounded by some very godly teachers, staff and students. And I also know that she is taught God's word every day....but again, something that can and should be done at home as well. I know I can't rely on the school to teach her where she stands on everything, that can and does come from our home.

Then after hearing this sermon.......I started thinking, Ok, well Halloween is just around the corner....what's a momma to do about this topic?? We've always let the girls go trick or treating and dress up....but I don't know about this year.....I just don't feel right about it. I don't want to send my girl's mixed signals about stuff like this...but is it a mixed signal??? Is it so wrong??? But, again.....godliness......not being like the rest of this world.

But then the "other" side of me says......we can only protect our children SO MUCH. The bottom line is....they will grow up and go out into this big big world, and I know my job is to make sure they are as ready for that as possible. Because let's face it...this world isn't full of's full of worldliness. I guess the bottom line where I'm at is, how far do we go in drawing the lines in our lives?? If we go the extreme route, we might be damaging our children and making them into little judgemental people, not adaptable to society......but if we don't stand our ground on things, then we could be sending them mixed signals and then they won't know where they stand on things making them just like society.

And all comes back down to weight ONCE AGAIN. I have to report, I did very well yesterday. Drank lot's of water, and nothing after 7pm!! No junk or sweets yesterday either. And as soon as I finish this entry and coffee of course, I'll be heading out on my LONG walk. But, I never knew this, but the term Gluttony...ever heard of it?? It's not a very nice word.......through, I came across this definition "the word means debauchees or wasters of their own body". OUCH. THEN, I came across this verse, Proverbs 23:21 "For the drunkard and the glutton will come to poverty, And drowsiness will clothe a man with rags." Bottom line gluttony does NOT equal godliness, again back to the sermon yesterday.

Oh this is one day I wish I could use up my "one phone call" to the Lord about. And YES, I know I can always "call him up" but I just wish it could be easy today.....the many mystery's of the Lord.....oh so many. So, if the Lord is speaking through YOU to me today, please let me know!! Don't hold back your thoughts on this one...let me know, please!!

Well, the coffee is I'm off for my walk. Maybe the Lord will speak through my walk this morning! I love you all so much and I'm praying for you all!! Have a BLESSED day!!


Paula said...

You were kind enough to leave a comment in response to my post at I love the way you think and write. You seem like such a wonderful and Godly woman. This post inspired me to think about Godliness in my own life. Also, I'm seriously gonna try to hold myself accountable to not eating after 7pm. Until next time, keep bringing healthy back, baby!!!

Leigh Gray said...

hey girl - if it is any consolation to you........we have been in both kinds of schools, live in different states, and just about done everything except homeschool.............we still have attitudes and such!! more than anything i think it is their age... love, leigh

the day is going well so far!!

Sharon said...

As many times as I try and run from the g word--I still come back as it smacks me in the face as I looking the mirror.
This weekend was rough and in my anger I sinned. That is what it is when you are stressed and angry and you sit down and eat almost a half gallon of ice cream.
That is not holy behavior.
I know I am holy--but my actions were not lining up with the reality.
Draw the line and be willing to stand on the side the Lord is.
If a conviction is not your own you will not maintain it. It is so simple, if I cannot picture Jesus doing it or standing up in support of it--I don't do it.
Now if I can just add eating to that list. :)
It is all about the heart. The change has to take place on the inside or the change on the outside will not last.
Dear God change our hearts.

CrownLaidDown said...

To link: open up the website and copy the link. Then to edit you post, click on the "link" button which looks like the eternity symbol or a chain link. In the blank that comes up, click paste and then ok it. That will link to your Legacy site.

Praying for you and for me to make one baby step choice every day in the right direction.
Way to go!