Friday, August 24, 2007

What's in a name?


Last night was a great night. We had Kris's family over to celebrate his grandfather's birthday, I believe he's 91.......but don't hold me to that. I always enjoy when he comes over because I never had the chance to spend so much time with my grandparents....since we lived on the other side of the world growing up!! =)

Well, after they had all left a huge storm blew through.....and my husband being the "koziarz town hero" (hee hee, like higgley town hero's) he's the electrician and does not recommend any baths during storms......he knows to much about wires and fires I guess. SO.....the girl's were filthy so we just all sat down in our den and watched the storm out the window. So somehow we were talking about stuff and Taylor asks me how I came up with her name....I was like......WELL, you know that movie She's All That??? and of course she says NO.....well I told her what that movie was about and the girl, Taylor Vaughn.......however you spell it......for some reason when I was watching it while pregnant with Taylor I was like, OH I LOVE THAT NAME....so that's how we came up with her name...she thought it was fabulous to be named after a movie! (even if that girl is crazy on that movie!!)

So in this house where there is one question like that there are always two questions like that....soon I know there will be three. Hopie says, "Tell me the story of MY name." Well, Hope does actually have a very special story and I realized this morning that I've never shared it on my blog so you get to hear it to!! We never found out if Hope was a boy or girl..simply because we had different insurance and you had to pay like $250 to have an ultrasound done to find out the sex of the baby. So, we thought, "well we'll just be surprised". Ok so when I was 8 months pregnant with Hope Taylor was just turning 2......she had to have surgery for her urinary reflux, very scary. So she had the surgery and was a NIGHTMARE and I mean NIGHTMARE when that child woke up. She was kicking me and it wasn't safe for me to be around her when she was like that. Thankfully she had a very sweet daddy who stayed by her side the majority of the day when she was acting like that.

After a LONG day at the hospital I actually began to have contractions.......scary. So the nurses all told me to go home and let Kris stay with Taylor....oh that broke my heart, I wanted to be there for her but I was flat exhausted and didn't need to be going into labor with a sick child. And come to find out that night my mother in law was also admitted into the hospital for a I think it was a kidney infections....craziness!! Ok so late, and I mean late that night I was driving home to get a few hours of sleep, I had to be back at the hospital by 6am for Kris to leave for work.....this was a time where if he missed work, he didn't get paid and we couldn't do without that for ANY amount of time.

I felt so hopeless as I was driving home........we had no money, so many bills and I knew more would be on the way from this surgery.......Kris and I were scared, nothing seemed to be in our favor.......Kris was also becoming very sick at this time, this was also when we found out he had Chron's disease, so life was just crazy!! Anyways, I turned on the radio and of course it was talk radio that late at night but for some reason I began to listen closely to this woman's story. This woman was talking about a baby that she had had that was very sick.......she died at 6 months old, VERY tragic.........but what was amazing was all the lives that had been changed by this baby......it reminds me of our church's baby Emma Grace....oh that baby still touches my heart.........Well, come to find out after the woman was talking for a while this baby's name was Hope.....and I thought, Oh that's a sweet name, didn't really think much else of it.

After the story was finished I turned off the radio and just started to pray. I felt this overwhelming sense of peace in that car with me and I have NEVER had anything like this happen before or since then, but I heard a voice......and it said, "You are going to have a baby girl and her name is to be Hope." Well, I started crying, and as soon as I got home I called Kris and I was going on and on about this experience........(all the while he's holding a screaming baby at 2am trying to get her to go to sleep....poor guy!!) So he's thinking "Oh my..she has lost it, I'm sure". I laid down to sleep and didn't find any so went back to the hospital early that morning.

So time went by and the time for this baby to come came very quickly. All the while keeping in the back of my mind this experience I had had..........was I crazy?? Was I hearing things??? So I go into labor late one night......we get to the hospital and the dr reads my chart and says, "Oh I see we're having a boy." I about jumped out of that bed!! I was like WHAT???? NO, I didn't even have an ultrasound........how on earth??? And then the nurses are all looking at the baby's heart beat saying, Oh ya, it's a boy.....look at that heartbeat. So, here I am IN AWFUL back pain labor and I have all these people telling me it's a boy.......my mom (who I had shared this story with) says, "Nicki, I think you'd better start thinking of boy names."

As time goes by, I'm telling my sweet labor nurse this story of what happened to me.....she's looking at me like, "Oh that child has had to many drugs......." and everyone, EVEN KRIS is looking at me like I'm crazy. So I'm like, WELL I DON'T HAVE ANY BOY NAMES PICKED OUT!!! So we're stressing out and I think we finally came up with Micheal something....Ok, so time to push....I'm absolutely devastated at this point. I'm pushing and pushing......oh my this baby has a big head!! =) So after about 20 minutes out it comes and the dr looks at me and smiles........."It's a girl." I CRIED MY EYES OUT........Kris says that I said "It's a girl" over and over!! Oh I squeezed that child and I just cried out to my Lord........thankful for her safe arrival and that indeed she was girl. At this point everyone in this room is crying, even KRIS!! We all knew that she was a gift from God and He has something very special planned for her life.

As I was telling Hopie that story last night......she looks at me and says, "Oh mommy, I'm gonna cry....." And the sweet child had tears all in her eyes. Being a middle child she often gets squished between those other two overbearing girly's and I truly think it meant the WORLD to her to know that God chose her name VERY specifically. Hope is just that.......so "hopeful".....she is a very peaceful and sweet child. She's a peacemaker and very sensitive. I've rarely had to get on her about being sassy or rude........Taylor does enough of that for everyone! =) She's very caring and loves her baby sister more than anyone I know. Ok, now this momma is all in tears..........(sigh) oh what a blessing all these girls are!!

Well, I'd better go, I "hope" you enjoyed this story of my sweet HopeAnn. Have a blessed day!!




7 comments:

Teri said...

Nicki,
What a blessing God has given me to be a part of you and your 3 girly girls lives. I love you. Thanks for always touching my heart. I was crying with you while I was reading! :o)
Love ya,
Teri

Nicki said...

Oh girl.....now you got me in tears again!! LOVE YOU!!!

Leigh Gray said...

my girls are always asking how they got their names too. I don't have any precious stories liek that!! wow, so special!!!

now what about Kennedy?

Nicki said...

Kennedy.....I'm really not sure how I came up with that!! I really think it was actually Kris who thought of it but I don't know.....however I did name her middle name Grace after Emma Grace.....since I was pregant with Kennedy during that whole time, and Kennedy was my third girl and Emma was Kim's third girl, I wanted to name her "grace" so I would know everytime I looked at her that she was "God's grace to me today." Woooo I'm all sentimental today! =) I'd better stop!!

CrownLaidDown said...

Precious! I really liked A Walk to Remember, but don't have the ability to watch it again...some things are hard to re-live.

I'm so glad you have Hope and that with Hope, your daling girl, came hope from the Lord. Wow! He is so good!
Love and prayers,
Holly

Sharon said...

That was so sweet.
How our children need a History.
We all need meaning. I wonder if all names still have important meaning with God like in th old testament?

I remember when I found out i had been named after my Mom's maternity wear--that was a let down. ;)
Glad ya'll had some great memories created last night.

Neva said...

Nikki,
Sorry I have been such a bad blogging friend. Have had the grandbabies (even the newborn) scads of company, VBS and studying for my test. On top of all that, my server has PMS or something, it has not been cooperating. Anyway, I am back and have enjoyed catching up on your posts.
Your stories about your girls are so touching. What blessings they must be.
Have a beautiful and amazing worship tomorrow.

Peace
Neva