Friday, March 02, 2007

Gotta get focused!

I will be so honest this morning. I have been SLACK this week with my quite time. I have overslept EVERY morning this week and really have been pushing getting up early aside. I'm paying for it today. As I awoke this morning, I felt my Lord, shaking His head at me and I feel like I took two steps backwards this week, instead of foreword. You see, when God convicts me of something like getting up early to have my time with Him FIRST, and I choose not to, everything starts to be a mess. And that is exactly what happened this morning. The dog is acting crazy, Kris is grumpy, Hope is awake before 6am, Taylor is grouchy, my house is a mess from chaos this morning and the worst part is, I'm pretty grumpy too. And I know, that had I been obedient this day would NOT have started this way or if it did, I would have been ready!!

Oh my sweet Lord, I'm sorry. I've messed up once again. But, I realize there is nothing I can do about it now, but at least I have stopped this day to get it right. Realizing I messed up this week and moving on, very important steps. I could very easily say, well, it's ruined! The day is ruined! But, oh no, not today. I refuse to let me joy be stolen anymore today!

I don't know what happened to my post yesterday, I tried to post it and my computer froze up so I had to restart it and by then I didn't feel like writing everything again! I did not accept the position at CMC, it's a long story, but I just didn't feel like that was not where God was leading me at this time. Everything was just way to complicated, as it is when you have three kids.....or any amount of kids for that matter. So, I'm at peace about, I know God spoke to me about it and so once again, I walk by faith and not by sight. So, I'm completely devoted to my home business which I'm trusting God is going to bless!! It's only by HIS hands will things be good, not by anything that I do. HIM working through me.

Ok, so this morning, I'm back on this Living Free study. Oh how I need to be FREE today!! =) Beth Moore is just.............awesome. The way she puts things into words, it's just incredible. Oh how I only hope that one day I will be able to write like that! I still would love to be a writer and I will continue to write and see where God leads, but wow, Beth Moore, is so right on! So much of our faith is based on simply believing IN God. But when asked the question: Do you have unbelief?, I might be a little insulted! WHY of COURSE I believe in God......but the question is not do you believe IN God, it's Do you BELIEVE GOD? Hmm, strong words. Have there been times in my life where I have questioned God? Absolutely! Not something I'm proud of, but something I'm willing to be very honest about.

God's word, the bible, is such a powerful tool. All throughout the bible I can find verses that relate to just about everything, (except finding joy in laundry....haven't found that yet! but when I do, I'll share!) Through every battle and fear we face, God's got something to say about it. It's my choice as to whether or not I want to overcome each stronghold I face with the power of scripture. Praying God's word is HUGE. It's taking HIS words, not ours and applying them directly to us. Don't you love it how someone will repeat back something wise you once said? It really makes you feel good, like Oh? I said that!?? I think it's the same thing with scripture. What wiser words could we find? So why wouldn't it make sense to pray God's own words?? I can tell you this, as I was trying to make that decision about the hospital, I continually prayed this: "I will trust in the Lord with ALL of MY heart and lean not on MY own understanding, but in all MY ways, I will acknowledge HIM and HE will make my path straight!" Every time I started to question anything, I prayed that verse.

I really believe it's why I can honestly say, I know I made the right choice. No matter how many times doubt pops in my head, I can say.....NO! I know because I prayed God's Word, and God makes NO mistakes! God makes NO, that's something to dwell on today. As many mistakes as I have made my whole life (whew........could write a book!) God has NEVER EVER made a mistake! Sweet words, from my sweet Lord today.

Well, I guess I'd better go...........a mountain of laundry awaits and bathrooms need to be cleaned! I WILL find joy in it!! =) Have a very blessed day!!

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