Friday, January 05, 2007

Selfish day.....

Yesterday I had a very selfish day. I allowed myself to get all worked up about this interview and this job! The thing is, as soon as I started feeling "yucky", anxious, worried and obsessed with knowing, I really did stop and pray. But, I think I only half-hearted gave it ALL to God. Maybe a part of me wanted to feel all stressed out???? As crazy as that sounds, I just can't explain it any other way. Life has been very stress-free the past two weeks. I really have been at peace about so many different aspects of my life. I felt like I was finally getting my weight under control, my house under control, getting this bible study going and even things with Kris. But oh no.....yesterday ALL of that just went out the window. It was almost like I was on strike with God or something! And may I confess, that is NOT how God wants me to be!!!

So, I awoke very early this morning, to meet with my Lord. Oh, it is so good, to really come and lay it all down at his feet. To not wonder if this is really what God wants, or is it really what I want. (i know it's what our fiances want!) It's just a JOB. In the whole scheme of everything, it's just a job. Whether I get that job or not doesn't measure who I am or what I have. Of course the flesh tells me otherwise, but my spirit this morning is so full of conviction after the day I had yesterday.

This morning I've come across the scripture Romans 15:4 "For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through endurance and the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope." That is so refreshing to me today! To know that I really did do the right thing by stopping my day and giving it over to God, but my flesh needed more yesterday, I needed to turn to scripture, find a verse and CLAIM it all day yesterday. So that is what I'm doing today. Psalm 18:16-17: "He reached down from on high and took hold of me; he drew me out of deep waters. He rescued me from my powerful enemy, from my foes, who were to strong for me." Oh yes, I was in deep water yesterday and my foes were WAY to strong for me! But today, oh today, He has reached down and touched me in a big way. I know that no matter what happens, it's all in His hands.

A friend of mine called yesterday and she said, Nicki you know if it's God's will He's going to make it happen, nothing is going to stop Him. And that is SO true. If I could just impound that in my heart today. This isn't my day, my job or my life, it's all His. Since I have given Him control of my life, I need to do just that..........GIVE IT TO HIM. He will reach down from on high and rescue me from Satan, if I will allow Him to!

Well, it's almost that time, time for alarm clocks to be going off. I'm glad it's Friday. My mother in law is taking ALL THREE of them tomorrow night! Yea!! =) Hopefully if God allows, I will hear something either way about this job today! But I refuse to let myself have a day like yesterday. I will stay very busy today to keep my heart and mind OFF it! I hope you have a very blessed day!!

ps: does anyone know what it means when you're supposed to write "labels" for this post??? what are the labels supposed to be???

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