Offensive Ways

Psalm 139:23-24 "Search me O God and know my heart, test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting."

That's a powerful verse! It takes a lot to pray that too. How important it is to daily come before our God and ask Him if there is anything "offensive" about ourselves! I'm not one to want to ask God to test me, however it is through our "tests" and "tribulations" that I truly believe we become all that God wants us to be. I have been "tested" a great deal the past two weeks, especially with my marriage and these girls. It's hard with Kris working so much and then when he's home he just wants to take a break. I completely understand that but it's also hard because there are still three little girls who require so much from us! I have been very anxious about decisions that need to be made and all the activities we have going on. I've been anxious about Kennedy and her ears, Hope and her lying and Taylor with her sassy attitude. Am I failing as a mom? Am I getting caught up with to much "stuff"? Have I offended others and my family because I'm burned out? Am I still completely devoted to the Lord and serving Him through these crazy days?

My mom has always used the phrase with me, "This to shall pass." And I know, these days will be gone before I know it. But what will be left of me if I drain myself into the girls and Kris and not my Lord? The answer is simple, I will be nothing when they are grown and gone. I will be incomplete. I love the end of that verse where it says, "And lead me in the way everlasting." When I read the word "everlasting" it makes me think of these words: endurance, strength, peace, joy, hope, success and life. With the Lord we really do have this "everlasting life" to have here now and earth and then for eternity in heaven. So, I can remove these "anxious thoughts" or "offensive ways" and focus on this everlasting life that God has given me now!

I can't wait for bible study to get back started. I've been writing every chance I get (which hasn't been to much this past week). The first topic we are covering is relationships. As I've been reading books and thinking about our relationships that we all have, I'm amazed at what God has to say about relationships!

Yesterday I had to take Kennedy back to the dr's while Hope was at pre-school. She has another ear infection. The dr. said that it seems like it's just going from one ear to the other. She gave her a shot and referred us to the ENT. So she's most likely going to need tubes. I know tubes are very common and many children get them, I just don't like seeing my baby in pain right now. It's going to be a couple of weeks before they can schedule the tubes so I definitely need endurance to get through this time. I will say the shot they gave her seemed to work because she didn't wake up last night. So that was a huge praise!

Taylor had her Christmas program at school last night, she did a great job! She had a little melt-down when she got home from school because she did not want to wear her Christmas dress. Taylor is very firm on her appearance, but sometimes I feel like she's skipped the little girl phase to quickly. I understand she wants to look "cool" but she's still only 6 years old! I know I have to pick my battles and that really shouldn't be one of them but I want her to still look her age, especially on Christmas.

Hope has performance #2 today and another one tomorrow. I will be SO glad when this Charlie Brown Christmas is over. Between the practices and performances, it's been a little crazy. She's very excited though. She LOVES to be the center of EVERYONE'S attention! And she's so darn cute!

I'm actually looking foreword to Christmas break with the girls. It will be nice not to have anything going on for a couple of days. And hopefully Kennedy will be feeling better so we can go to the Y in the mornings. Although Taylor hates going to the childwatch so I'm sure that will be a battle! =) Well, I'd better go, the day is starting without me! I hope you have a very blessed day and non-offensive day! =)