Friday, November 03, 2006

The Act of Self-Control

Self-control has been and is a hard issue for me to deal with. In my "younger" years I was a very impulsive shopper. My money was mine and I bought exactly what I saw fit with it. In high school I remember I worked, just to shop. I was impulsive, buying whatever I saw fit. I never saved and constantly overdrew my account thus have to running to the National Bank of Mom's and Dad's at least once a month for gas money!

Now as I've gotten a little older, I've seen different areas of my life where I lack self-control. I'm certainly not a shopper anymore, in fact I've gone completely opposite of how I used to be, I feel guilty if I spend money on myself. The girls are always in need of something and I feel bad because I'm a stay at home mom, not bringing in a whole lot of income.

After having three kids in five years, I guess my interests shifted and I allowed lack of self-control to flow into other areas of my life. Food, exercise, my walk with God and sometimes my mouth. But, I've seen what is truly missing when you lack self-control, it's called DISCIPLINE. I think for so long I was just praying for self-control in all of these areas of my life and I was expecting God to just step down from heaven and make me perfect. But, until I really started disciplining myself to get up every morning, to go to the Y and think before I speak, nothing was changing. I'd say just over the past three months I've finally had that light-bulb moment. Now, that doesn't mean that I've reached my goal in this weight loss, or I've become all that Christ wants me to be or I've never said anything bad about anyone again. It just means that, I got it. I see what it takes to be a true disciple of Christ, and it's a tough job.

This morning on the news I heard that there is a preacher who is being accused of having a homo-sexual relationship while he is trying to fight same-sex marriage. They don't know who is telling the truth exactly but it's not looking to good for this minister. They said he has five children. I was like, wow, once again you see that even people who we put up on petal stools have areas in their lives where they lack self-control. It's a huge battlefield, this self-control thing.

But, I love this verse in Proverbs I read this morning. Prov 25:28 Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control. Isn't that the truth?? I know I will never be perfect in this life-time, I know I will always have battles of self-control in my life and they may switch areas like they did from when I was in high-school until now. But, I hope that I can at least recognize the areas and not let myself get to where I've been and the effects I'm feeling from it. (to much weight on)

Well, it's laundry and super-cleaning day around here. I really hope Kennedy is feeling better today, she's been a HUGE mess this past week. Her ears must really be bothering her a lot because she is pulling on them a great deal, I thought her medicine would be working by now, hopefully today it will be better! Well, I hope you all have a blessed day and a great weekend!

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