Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Oh what a night..........

Well, I feel like a complete zombie today. Taylor was up almost the whole night and along side of her was Kennedy. I think they both just have awful colds. I'm still unsure if Taylor might have strep........we'll have to see if we need to go to the dr.'s today. Yesterday was a long day, just hanging out with sick kids. I did get quite a bit of cleaning done which is always good. I guess today will be more of that!

Ok, so since I was up so much last night, I just could not fall back asleep each time between awakenings. God was speaking to me at 3:30 this morning! I have to confess to you all that I have been so demanding of God lately....This situation with this job is just not getting settled as quickly as I would like it to. I know I have been offered a full time position but I just don't think I can do full time nights. And the unit has a part time two nights a week position as well. For some reason and I really mean, ONLY GOD KNOWS WHY, I just have not gotten an answer as to whether or not they will be offereing me the part-time one. I'm sure it's just been a lot of playing phone tag between people and trying to get things worked out......but ya'll.....I'm ready to pull my hair out. This is going on three weeks now since I interviewed. I keep going back to God saying, PLEASE just give me an answer.....either way...just tell me Lord what it is. But what do I get? Silence..... I know I'm not supposed to do the full-time one, I know what my body can handle and I just can't do it with three little ones. And each day I start my day saying, Lord, whatever happens is in your hands so I commit it to you.....then half-way through the day I'm on my knees begging God for an answer! Oh how frustrated God must get with me!

So, again I start this day, holding on for victory. I love this verse I've been led to this morning.....Ecclesiastes 3:15 "Whatever is has already been, and what will be has been before; and God will call the past to account." I was talking to Kris last night about all of this and I just said, what is in my life that I'm just not being able to hear from God on this.........and there it came at 3:30 this morning. My demands on God..........God's time frame is not mine......who am I to say, God I need an answer by 5pm today??? And ok, it's not like God is not answering any of my prayers.......Just this week God has answered three big prayers of mine.....1. I came back into contact with my mentor, Beth. She is just the most awesome Christian woman to follow her lead, and we just lost contact with eachother, well, on Sunday we ran into eachother and we were able to exchange numbers again. 2. My friend from Sunday school, who I believe God sent as my new prayer partner 3. A friend of mine called me yesterday afternoon and calmed my heart about this sleep-walking thing. (and I didn't even have to research it on the internet!) So God is speaking and God is working.

oh.......gotta run......Taylor's throwing up!

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