Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Tattle Tellin Reverse?

Now listen you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money. Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes."

-James 4:13-14

Moments in time. That is what we are.

Not hours, not years, not centuries...moments. "Mists".

In the blink of an eye you or I could be gone from this earth forever. And the last words we say...they will forever ring in the ears of someone who heard them.

I'm about to get brace yourself. ;)

These past few months there have been days where I have woken up and looked around the world beside of me and wondered how you get to this point in life. So many people seem to be just going through the motions. Not caring, Not believing in, Not hopeful, just numb.

I guess with the recent Facebook "fad" and more people jumping into blogging and e-mails at the tip of our fingers we are becoming a society that can so easily encourage, so easily build each other up and so easily within a few seconds of a day just say that they love someone.

And yet....we don't.

But here's what we are quick to do....draw lines of defeat towards other's before they even have the ability to cross us. Peer into other's lives without ever having to say a word. Seek out self-gratification and looking out for number one...ourselves.

I get that in the depths of our souls we are all just really afraid of being rejected ourselves, it's why we play the games we play. But sometimes, I just think that we are becoming a society that will only support, only build up and only give pats on the back to people who are playing on our side of the team.

Recently I was talking to someone and she said, "My view is the kingdom view, whatever builds the kingdom up, I'm for it." I thought a lot about what she said and how very true her words are. My heart aches every time I hear someone say or see someone acting like their church, their ministry or their blog, or their "way" is it. Because, I think we miss out on a lot of blessings with that point of view.

Recently a situation made me think about all of this.

My girls had all come running in the room at the same time to do some major tattle tellin a few days ago! And anyone who knows me, knows I don't "do" tattlin. I just don't deal with it! If I see something, hear something or someone is physically hurt.....I deal with it. But don't come whining to me about someone taking Malibu Barbie or looking at you the wrong way! I don't want to hear it!!!

Well, they were all standing directly in front of me and they were SO eager to dish on each other's wrongful acts. I looked at their little mad faces and said something I rarely do, "Ok, who did it?"

And at the exact right moment, they all pointed three different fingers in three different faces. Kennedy pointed to Taylor, Hope to Kennedy and Taylor to Hope. And they all yelled at the same time, "SHE DID IT!"

Well, I got to thinking about this situation and how eager my girls are to sell each other out. The couldn't wait for me to ask who was to blame! The moment of "She did it!" alone brought some major relief to their little souls.

However, over the past few years I have noticed that they are not so willing to come running up to me and say, "Mommy, you'll never believe how awesome Hope is at jumping!"....I mean, the pumpin up encouragement, it just doesn't happen that often!

As I was thinking about this verse and how just how quite possibly with my girls the last thing they could ever do to each other is point the finger of blame and sell each other out....what a tragedy that would be!

But what about us "big girls"? What if the last words out of our mouths were something that tore someone down? Or pointing the finger? Or participating in gossip? Or didn't give that last "way to go" to the person who desperately needed it?

Friends, it's time. Today is the day. Now. I can guarantee that there is someone in your life today that needs to hear a "Way to go!" or "Keep pressing through!" or "I just want to tell you that I think you rock!"

I don't think there's a soul in this world who has heard enough "Atta girls." But my oh my...there has been many a silence stares, many a negative words and many a frowns given away like nothing ever before., I'm going to try something new with my girls. And they will hate me for it but love me later....every time they come a runnin to tattle, I'm going to stop them, listen and say, "Ok, now say something she did right today."

It will be much of a Tattle Tellin Reverse!

Check back tomorrow to see how it goes! ;) And perhaps it will begin a small revolution in my build up and to not destroy.

Have a blessed day my friends and if no one has told you yet are beautiful, you are a shinning star and I think you rock! :)


The Pifer's said...

Oh I just love your blog!!!!

Amy L Brooke said...

Wonderful. How did it go?

the alleys said...

amen, girl! btw--i think you're the best. seriously :).

April said...

Hi Nicki!
Thank you so much for your prayers in regards to the situation I posted about last night. Really means A LOT!

Robin said...

This is such a GREAT concept! I've tried it a few times with my teenage daughters! Funny how it works not matter the age.

Kay Martin said...

You hit the big one today! I've found I can only give that kind of love when I'm secure in me. It's an inside job that only Holy Spirit: Christ in me, has been able to do for me. Jesus loves me; I'm eternally secure; my steps are ordered by God...when all of this is no. 1 in my mind I am free to rejoice or weep with you. Then I am free to love you; really love you and truly BE THERE.

Again you are divinely writing.

Jennifer said...

Great blog Nicki and so true. I dropped in this morning to "build up" and show my gratitude to Emma's teacher. This has been a tough year for Emma and without her awesome teacher, Emma would not have been as successful.It is so important to show your appreciation to people ( even the cashier at grocey store ) because chances are it will change them and they will pass it along!

Mulchy Mama said...

You are so right!! I am typing this as Brooke and Eva have just come into the study to tattle on each ironic! Think I will put it into practice right now!! :)
Hope you enjoy having a sitter today!
Love you, sweet friend. And I think you're awesome too!!

Rebecca Jo said...

You amaze me EACH time I'm here with your words!!!

I LOVE this concept.. cant wait to see how it turns out!

Jennifer said...

Tattle Tellin Reverse...I love that!!

TammyIsBlessed said...

That's great!

I've tried that myself recently. If one of our girls has hurt or been mean to one of the others, they have to apologize and then say something nice about them. The saddest part was, they didn't have a clue what I meant until I gave them several examples of what they could say!